WEDDING ANNIVERSARY: 5 Facts About Marriage You Should Know From My Experience Thus Far

 Our first wedding ceremony in what usually makes up a series of ceremonies for most African marriages, was held at the Federal Marriage Registry in Ikoyi, Lagos, Nigeria, on the 12th of October, 2016 and as you have most likely worked out, it's our 5th anniversary today. Only 5 years? Many of my seniors in the business would say. Yes 5 years and if you ever wondered like myself in the past, how couples managed to stay together for even a few years, then you will realise that for some of us 5 years is a milestone. Let's not talk of the many young marriages that do not see the light of day, despite elaborate wedding ceremonies. In addition to a few pictures of myself and my family, find below 5 golden facts you must know from my marriage experience thus far. If you are yet to take the plunge and still dreaming of meeting Snow white in all her glory, this article might help you. I will also be waiting to hear the opinion of my seniors in this business and others in the comments section.

Engagement Date: July 2016

#1. If your marriage is based on erotic and material attraction alone, I'm sorry to burst your bubble because sooner than later, you MAY be booking appointments with a Divorce Lawyer. I feel that this fact is the most important. That physical beauty can depreciate with age or that things may not always be smooth financially is no news. What next for you, if things do not pan out as you fantasised from the get go? After 2 children, Eri has had her struggles with maintaining the size she was when I met her and so have I. I used to be Medical College 'MR MACHO' at some point and when Eri met me, my 6 packs were still in good shape but an amalgamation of my packs occurred and I am finding it very difficult to break up the 1 pack that dangles beneath my anterior abdominal wall now and what's she going to do about it?  We have also had our moments of financial needs to cater to aspirations and desires but we have managed to keep our heads up through it all thus far and the hustle continues.

Somerset, England/UK: October 2021

#2. If you are the type of person that wants to take every issue to tribunal and never ignores somethings, I am sorry because your marriage may end after battle upon battle. "Why should you talk to me like that, are you mental?" "Why would you dare to forget this special date in my life, you don't love me any more and you must tell me why or you won't leave this house"! Uncle/Aunty, it is a giving that, your spouse will unknowingly talk to you in a way that you don't like at some point. Somebody will forget somebodies parents wedding anniversary or some other special date. If you choose to turn your house into a battle front for these, it's up to you. I'm usually the guilty one with dates and a jokingly verbalised reminder suits me well. Eri blesses me with a piercing frown when I unknowingly talk to her in a way she is unhappy with and I think I do same. This is not to say we have not had our moments but you just can't take everything to the tribunal, otherwise the place will implode. 

Westminster, London,UK: September 2021

#3. If you are the type that needs attention from your partner/spouse 24 hours of 7 days of every week, I wish you the best of luck if you are not able to find a balance with this because you may end up dejected and feeling that your spouse no longer loves you at some point. The reality is that, one thing or the other will temporarily take priority over giving you attention at some point, especially children when they enter the equation. 

Somerset, England/UK: October 2021

😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😍

Somerset, England/UK: October 2021

#4. One person cannot always be right! I used to always feel I was right about every thing, so if you are in this boat you were not alone but you can understand the frustration this must have been causing Madam Eri, can't you? Even if you are right 99.9% of the time, there's still going to be that 0.1% when you are likely to be wrong and what if something critical could have been avoided? I got to learn that, it's always good marital practice to listen to your partner's opinion and act accordingly sometimes, without slamming the VETO hammer for  every decision making exercise that pops up!

#5. Finally, it's "FAMILY OVER EVERYTHING"! The first ever author of this popular quote is not at all far from the truth. If you are the type that pleases everyone else except your wife and kids, then sorry is all I can say. Some people might say,"is there really anyone like this?" Some stories will leave your jaw dropped for days unending and it will always remain difficult to understand what drives that thought process. I'll cross the mountains and oceans for my immediate family especially and extended family as much as possible.

A very big thank you to every one who spent some form of energy to wish us all. I say a big Amen to all the prayers and wish you all the same. Please don't forget to drop your thoughts in the comments section below. I'm keen to read about your opinions on the issues raised and many more. Cheers.